Some takeaways as a Psychology student and a part-time trainer with young children

As a Psychology major, I’ve always been interested in human behavior and how we process our thoughts and feelings. But over the last two years of study, what really struck me the hardest was how much of children’s behavior can be shaped simply by altering the way we deal with them when faced with their obedience, disobedience, mistakes and mischief. I am not a parent and I know parenting is a lot more complex than any manual ever can guide, and that each child is unique, with…


I was about ten steps behind you and the moment I saw you, I thought, ‘god I miss being like that’.

I think you reminded me of me, at your age – that’s about five. Your hair was let down and you were in a white cardigan and comfy pink shorts, and silver ballerina flats that you probably know as shiny grey shoes. And you were holding your father’s hand. …


I’ve taken communication for granted all this while, because it’s so natural, so intuitive, so easy. We communicate in words and actions, even facial expressions, and that’s how we’ve lived our lives with family and friends.

When I got into a relationship almost four years back, I began hearing even more advice about communication. ‘Talk to your partner’, they said. ‘Communicate your needs, wants, feelings.’

As someone who hardly gets into conflict with others, I didn’t see why communication would be harder or any different in a romantic relationship. But it is, a little.

It took me many months to…


i used to be so afraid
because happiness wasn’t a constant
not for me, not for anyone
it scared me that every good moment and experience
would come to an end

even while experiencing joy, i was never fully present
i thought about how the high would subside eventually, probably soon
and i dreaded it
it felt like good times came with a price
and that was the sense of loss that always followed

but i had been shortchanging myself
by seeing how each time the wave hit the shore
it would recede back to the body it belonged to
by remembering every…


What could we say instead?

We all know the phrase ‘this too shall pass’, and chances are we’ve said them to our loved ones and heard them as a consolation in times of despair. It is a convenient thing to say, and I believe most of us truly mean to encourage others with the light at the end of the tunnel, but sometimes, it doesn’t provide the comfort we think it does.

Here’s why.

It could sound dismissive and insensitive.

Take a mental illness for example. For someone who suffers from an anxiety disorder and experiences symptoms in the form…


When we understand the underlying emotions, we learn so much more about the people behind the anger, and how we can better deal with them.

Anger is identified as one of the six basic emotions humans experience, according to Paul Ekman, a renowned American psychologist. (You probably would’ve known about this already if you’ve watched Disney’s Inside Out).

All of us know what anger feels like. It is less confusing than emotions such as confusion, embarrassment, guilt and the like. …


And how do I practise it?

Mindfulness is not an unfamiliar term to most people. It’s a concept that has gained popularity over the past decade or so, stemming from Eastern religious beliefs and values and then being explored in Western psychology.

What are some terms that come to mind when we mention Mindfulness? Some would say awareness, others would say letting go, and yet others would define it as living and being in the moment.

Well, they are all components of Mindfulness.

And one of the many constructs central to this concept is Self-compassion.

What is Self-compassion?

Self-compassion, simply put, is pretty…


A few weeks back on World Mental Health Day, I wrote a post about suicide rates around the world and some takeaways I had from spending some time looking at datasets, articles as well as feedback I got on my first reddit post. On that post, I shared about a new insight I got regarding suicide rates of males vs females in different countries. I was surprised and a little disturbed to find out that male suicide rates outnumbered females’ in almost every country in the world. …


What’s the Difference and Why it Matters

Today is the 10th of October, which is also the annual World Mental Health Day. This year, the World Health Organisation has called for a focus on suicide prevention — something that I believe should be a focus on any day, any year, and really, anytime.

[fig1]

It came as a surprise to me. When we think ‘suicide’ or ‘mental health’, the next word that is activated in our head is probably ‘depression’, and most of us are inclined to believe that females face that problem way more than men.

But this isn’t what this chart is saying. As of now…

Claudine Tan

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store